I know I’m not the only one out there who compares. It’s something we all do. We compare the entirety of our lives to the 5 seconds we see of someone else’s. We compare ourselves to the “digital nomads”, traveling to all these exotic places and taking pictures of perfectly timed sunsets, getting paid thousands for just one Instagram post…while we ourselves are tied to a dead end job where we never get the promotions we want. We compare ourselves to those women in Pantene ads who always have such super silky hair, that looks perfect when thrown casually in slow motion…while our own hair might be just a little frizzy and out of control on the best days.
We compare our financial stability, our homemaking skills, parenting skills, college degrees, waist to hip ratios, our circles of friends, our contour palettes and extensive makeup collections, our workout routines and PTA involvement…sometimes, to other women we have never even met.
It gets really exhausting, doesn’t it? And yet…we still do it. We all are guilty of this, I think. It’s become part of the culture in our world. We compare and overshare.
So, Girls of Cyber World. 🌎Here are a few things I would like to say:
1) You are all so incredibly beautiful.
We’re all different, and yet we’re all beautiful. If you are feeling particularly beautiful at any moment in time, take the picture and post it. But know that your beauty doesn’t diminish in the slightest when you don’t get as many likes as you want.
2) Another woman’s beauty does not take away or dim your own.
She may have a better complexion than you. She may have a tiny waist, the prettiest, naturally curly hair, vibrantly colored eyes, a natural finesse and sense of style, maybe she looks model perfect when she laughs, or she exudes confidence in everything she does. Don’t hate.
We all have qualities that other people might wish they had. Some people can talk to anyone like they’ve know them their entire life. Some people love creating works of art, whether it’s through painting, writing, singing or photography. Sometimes, it’s more about the talents we each possess. Just know that you are uniquely you…and so is she. Her talents, looks and personality don’t take away from your own.
3) We should all aspire to be the best versions of ourselves, not other people.
Sometimes, it’s easy to look at someone else and want what they have, but then you wouldn’t be you!
Let’s be honest–sometimes, we won’t be anywhere close to the best versions of ourselves. We may be slobby and wearing sweatpants, antisocial and self-critical, or stuck in a rut at best. Give yourself a break. We can’t be at 100% all the time.
It may be that you forgot to sign your kid’s permission slip again or you ate something from the list of foods deemed “unhealthy” by the overzealous Fit Fam and now you’re beating yourself up. Or you just don’t feel like socializing when you’ve had a certain event on your calendar for weeks or you said something nasty under your breath when that person cut you off in traffic.
We all have days that suck, the thing to remember is that day is just one day. You get to start over tomorrow. ✌🏻
4) Comparison is the thief of joy.
I love this quote. The only person you should compare yourself to is who you were yesterday.
You have learned so much in this lifetime and gone through so many, life changing events. The girl you were yesterday may not have been able to predict where the girl you are today is now(Whoa! 😳), but I can bet she would be proud of all you have accomplished.
5) Take time for yourself.
On the days where you aren’t feeling up to something, step back and take a break. Read a favorite book. Indulge in a sweet treat. Do something you normally wouldn’t for yourself. Sometimes, our brains and bodies have ways of letting us know when we need to take a second for ourselves. I recommend a social media hiatus every once in a while too. It’s a nice way to reset, be with your own thoughts, and just relax.
So, Girls—keep on being you. The world might tell you to look like this or talk like that, but you should be yourselves. ✌🏻
Just thought I’d spread a little encouragement around. Hope you all are having an awesome weekend! 👍🏻💕